Coping with death is rarely an easy process.Â This past week the angel of Death paid a visit to my dear friend, Guru Kar Singh, aka Kenny Valez.Â Kenny became my friend during my Kundalini Yoga Teacher Training experience.Â He was so generous he allowed me to stay at his place on our overnight intensive weekends.
This extra time together afforeded me a special bond with Kenny as we related to one another on how we were integrating the experiences.Â We became so close we even convinced him and his partner Peter to come visit us last year for a Farmer’s Marketing in Madison.Â Kenny was like a brother to me.Â At one time we got lost on a field trip and he said, “Krishan do you think we were brothers in a past life.”Â Â I thought, ya know, probably and in fact he was a brother to me in this life as well.
I miss my brother.
Kenny’s passing brought back a slew of feelings and emotions about the loss of my best friend Tony a few years ago.Â Coping with death is rarely an easy process.
I just learned that my dear friend Sarah lost her grandmother this week.Â Sarah is my friend that opened my world up the chakras and my heart goes out to her and her family.
So how do we cope with death?
Coping with Death: Spiritually some Yogic Perspective
Energetically death is a very challenging thing to process for those whom are left behind.Â Especially in the case of those who seem to leave us all too early, as was the case with Kenny, questions of Why pop up.Â Why did this have to happen to him?Â Why did this have to happen to him now?Â Why didn’t I make a point to spend more time with him while he was still here?Â Why?Â Why?
Well one has to process this mental energy of questioning.Â A useful means for doing this is through Acceptance.Â It kind of makes it difficult to accept things when loss is involved, but we must take a step back from this temporal view of things.Â When viewed from the perspective of the immortal Soul acceptance is a much more natural step in the process.Â The Soul is the keeper of when it is time to go, in Kundalini Yoga it is said that every individual is born with a specific number of breaths, pranic cycles if you will, that will carry them through their present incarnation.Â At the proper time, when the number of breaths has run out, the Soul transitions out of its present body.Â The saying…”It was his time” is very true, humbling and useful in accepting death/transition.
For those more scientifically oriented acceptance of the fact that energy cannot be destroyed it can only be transformed or transferred also can bring a kind state of acceptance.
Transition is a more positive term than death for it implies that this is merely one step in the process.Â In Kundalini Yoga there is a Spiritual practice for the living to assist the one who has transitioned in making the journey home.Â We chant Akal for them.Â Akal means Deathless, or Undying.
“You did not die.Â Continue and go on.Â I let you go.Â This can encourage the soul to go onto it’s true home” The Aquarian Teacher
I began my practice of Akal the day after I heard Kenny had transitioned.Â I continued it today and sent the energy to Sarah’s grandmother as well.Â I had an interesting vision a couple days ago when chanting Akal, I saw a door opening, that’s it.Â Simple, yet powerful at the same time–transition.Â I have also found that chanting Akal helps to center my being in the knowledge that this crazy thing called life is just one step in the process and that my Soul is immortal, which brings further acceptance.
There is comfort in transition.Â Comfort that you may meet your loved one again in Heaven, or possibly in another life time.Â And when you get there you can say, “Hey you bum, why did you leave me so soon.Â Next time stick round for a bit, I so enjoy relating to you.”
Being around friends and family also helps to cope with the loss of a friend.Â It really just makes you appreciate them more and think of ways to be with them more, because that’s what’s really important.
I’ve also found that writing about those who have transitioned is also very good for coping.Â Sharing these writings with others also helps.
I pray for those who have transitioned, may the light guide your way home.
I pray for those who are still among us, may you find your way on.